Q: When I came here last time, there was this great post about how someone had made to you a couple of wildly inappropriate, anti-gay comments. In the post of which I speak, you dissected those comments in such a brilliant, witty and hilarious fashion, I simultaneously was doubled over with laughter and achieved enlightenment. I came back here so that I could get the link and send it to all my friends and family (especially the homophobic ones), but I can’t find it. Where’d it go?*
A: A byproduct of the post to which you are referring is that it cast a particularly unflattering light on the person who made the wildly inappropriate, anti-gay comments … not only because it exposed what I think is a despicable prejudice that this person has, but also because I used my scathing wit to verbally flog the offender with his own offensive remarks.
The person in question—who, by the way, I am fairly certain could not care less what I, or anyone else, for that matter, thinks about his viewpoints—resides on a semi-distant branch of the Scratches Family Tree, and, in the day or so after I published the post in question, it occurred to me of my own accord that, though I took care to maintain that person’s anonymity, his identity would likely be obvious to some other members of the Scratches Family Tree who visit this site.
I do not truly dislike this person, nor do I think he is a bad person. I do, however, think he has some really offensive views. Be that as it may, I found myself feeling surprisingly uncomfortable about essentially hammering this person behind his back, and about the familial discord and controversy that my post had the potential to create. Thus, I yanked it.
Lest anyone think I’m a big pussy who caved in to some external pressure, I assure you that at no time did anyone who read the post of which you have so unfortunately been robbed say to me anything uncomplimentary about it or suggest in any way that I remove it. I have an internal compass, and, every once in a while, I follow it.
*No one asked me this question; I made it up. I thought that was obvious, but a certain someone has indicated to me that, apparently, it isn’t.
Sounds like a pretty sensible decision to make to me. I’ve yanked a few posts about my work in the past.
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I was wondering if you were at a wedding that a certain family member of mine was attending . . .
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Dan: Thanks for the encouragement. It’s kinda like sending an email and then wishing you hadn’t … except, with a blog, the good part is that you can un-send it, so to speak.
Tami: Oh, there’s at least one (and usually more) in every family.
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I agree with Dan: sounds like it was the right thing to do.
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Thanks, Vered. Nice to hear that fellow bloggers agree with the decision.
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Hmmm… is this post or person’s identity available off the record?
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Perhaps if you ply me with alcohol at a family function some day …
Hope you had a great honeymoon!
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