We said “Goodbye” to The Crib tonight.
The Crib has been a part of our lives since before Zan was born. Prior to his arrival, we set it up in our apartment. Eventually, we placed him in it, and, not long thereafter, moved him and it to our house. When he graduated to a fire-engine bed, we placed Jayna in it.
And, then last summer, Zan graduated to an actual twin-sized, big-boy bed. And Jayna decided she wanted one, and that she wasn’t interested in getting a transitional bed shaped like a pixie-dust-covered-pumpkin-chariot-princess-fairy thing. So, voila. There it is, assembled by yours truly, earlier this evening.
For some time now, Jayna has been prepared for the fact that the move to the big-girl bed would coincide with the dismissal of her pacifier, a.k.a. “pahpiece,” a.k.a. the thing she is addicted to, and that has made her teeth all screwy-louie to the point that she is likely to have until adulthood a lisp that would make a young Cindy Brady sound like a world-class speech therapist.
When she came into my office today and asked if we could put together her bed tonight, I couldn’t say “no” … and I’m glad I didn’t, because she was psyched when I said “yes.” I’ve never seen her so excited. In fact, during the several hours between when she asked and when she finally went to bed, her behavior was consistent with that of a person who has snorted a five-ounce bag of cocaine laced with Red Bull and espresso.
It was in that coked-up state that she left my office and ran upstairs to tell Mommy (who, in a flagrantly manipulative fashion, had sent Jayna and Zan to ask me about putting the bed together) that Daddy the Pushover had agreed to do so, at which point I missed the following historic event:
“Jayna: bye-bye crib!” said Mommy, high-fiving our daughter.
“Woo-hoo! And bye-bye pahpiece!” exclaimed Jayna, ripping the plug out of her mouth and chucking it into the trash, which I’m told caused Mommy and Zan to exchange a look of mutual shock and awe. So much so, in fact, that Zan immediately ran back downstairs to my office.
“Daddy, you are not gonna believe this very exciting news! Jayna just said ‘Bye-bye, pahpiece!’ and threw it in the trash!”
Amazingly, she didn’t once ask for it when it came time to get in her new bed for the night, and, thanks to a ridiculously exhausting day, she quickly fell to sleep.
Of course, like any good addict, we fear she soon will be going through pahpiece withdrawal, one of the most prominent characteristics of which, I’m quite certain, will be the emission of a high-frequency, unbelievably sustained and glass-shatteringly loud scream likely to deafen every dog within a half-mile radius.
It sure would be ironic if her effort to break out of her pahpiece addiction caused her father to develop a valium addiction, wouldn’t it?
14 Comments
LOL! That is too cute and I’m sure that was a shock that she actually threw the pacifier in the trash! There’s something about those second children, some things are just so much easier! Love your blog!
That’s awesome, congrats to Jayna! I can’t wait until your third is in her big girl bed although there is part of me that aches to see my baby grow up
It’s so funny how they get it stuck in their heads that they will give up one thing when something else happens. I have several times heard from my neices and nephews things like, “I won’t need pull ups when I’m 4″, or “I can’t do it by myself, but when I’m 6 I can”. They won’t even try until that cataclysmic event comes around that gives them the super-powers they need to move on to the next growing up stage. Kids are funny little things.
Just like you never see cat skeletons in trees, you never see kindergartners go to the first day of school with pacifiers in their mouths. There’s something to be said for positive peer pressure.
My Daughter is a tink fan too, it’s like Disney threw up in our house.
Congrats on the big girl bed!
My daughter was very attached to her pacifiers (she called it her wabish?!?) and I feared the worst. However, one day when she was three she threw hers in the trash too. Later that day she instinctively wondered where one was and then she remembered that she had decided that she was done. And that was it!! She never asked for one, she never had trouble sleeping…nothing.
And her teeth turned out just fine. Hope it’s that easy for Jayna!
Great story,Loved it!!!!!
Keep on Truckin
That’s too cute! It sounds like the Tinkerbed was a hit! I hope giving up the pahpiece stays as simple as it was =)
They grow up so fast!
My daughter, too, was addicted to a pacifier, so much so that when we tried to break her of the habit, she’d use one of those wooden puzzle pieces with a knob as a substitute.
So, for her 2nd birthday, we got her very excited about a new idea: The Binky Fairy. You see, when little girls turn 2, they have a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to turn in their binkies for a very special big girl toy. So, we made a special box, decorated with her favorite stickers, and wrote a note to the Binky Fairy, asking her to please give all of Lauren’s binkies to little children who needed them. That night, we put the box on her dresser, and as she slept, the “fairy” snuck a big girl slide into her bedroom. It was adorned with a note from the fairy.
Funny enough, my little pacifier addict went cold turkey from the start and never asked for a binky again. Maybe the Tinkerbed is your kiddo’s version of the slide
.
So has she gone into withdrawal yet?
Stumbled across the blog and have really been enjoying it.
I am starting fatherhood 2.0 in October at age 42. My first son will be almost 17 when 2.0 starts, should be interesting. Keep up the great posts!
What a great story – can’t wait to read about the follow-up pacifier meltdown.
Woo Hoo! Go Jayna! We’ve just gotten our daughter out of our bed and into the crib – of her own accord as well. SHOCKING. Can’t wait to hear if the binky can maintain it’s retirement status!
Dana: I agree about the second-child thing! And thanks for the compliment. Glad you’re enjoying the blog.
Americas Next Top Mommy: Third? Third??? There shall be no third child, thank you. (Clearly, you’ve not yet read the one about my vasectomy!)
Sonia: Yeah, sometimes, it’s like some internal switch gets flipped.
Jennine: Never heard the “cat skeletons in trees” one before. I might need to use that.
Nat: I wish it only looked like Disney threw up in our house! It looks like Toys-R-Us had a bulimia convention in our house!
Kelly: Love the “wabish” thing. And it’s encouraging to hear about the teeth. Fingers crossed.
Brenda: Thanks!
Lynn: Why didn’t we think of that? We do the same thing with “Wendy the Witch,” who takes the Halloween candy and replaces it with a toy. Don’t know where our heads were on the Pahpiece Fairy!
Innkeeper Seely: Stay tuned …
Karl: Glad you’re enjoying the site, and thanks for the compliment. Also, thanks for reminding me what a wonderful day it was when I got a vasectomy.
E: Thanks. And we shall see …
Smashmom: The world holds its breath and waits …