My wife insists that I keep blogging. Basically, whatever happens from here on in is her fault, is what I’m saying.

SCENE: A screened-in porch in the suburban-Philadelphia area. We see Daddy Scratches and Wonder Woman consuming margaritas … delicious, Cabo Wabo-tequila-filled margaritas … so delicious, in fact, that this narrator currently is fantasizing about drinking roughly a dozen of them … but I digress. Let’s listen in.

DS: My blog is dying. I don’t know what to do. I haven’t had any time for it, and, quite frankly, I’m having a hard time getting motivated to do anything with it … but I don’t know if I could just walk away from it.

WW: [incredulously] Walk away from it? You can’t walk away from it. No way. All the nights I’ve gone to bed alone or taken the kids out so you’d have time to work on it? No, you’re not walking away from it. Sorry.

FADE OUT

Alrighty, then. Guess I’m still blogging.

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59 Comments

  1. Krista T
    Posted April 12, 2011 at 2:17 pm | Permalink

    Don’t quit! Haven’t you noticed that we drink in the most mundane things that you feel like blogging about?? You can blog about watching paint dry, and we all read it because of the WAY you write. Please keep writing! 🙂

  2. Posted April 12, 2011 at 2:23 pm | Permalink

    I agree with Krista, you could write about watching paint dry and I’d read it. Your photography is great as well. Maybe focus on photography for a little while and give the writing side of you brain a break? To sound really hokey, creativity comes in ebbs and flows. You’re just waiting it out right now, it’ll come back to you.

    See you on your next blog,
    Jessie
    Jessie´s most recent blog post: A Tangled KnotMy Profile

    • Posted April 12, 2011 at 2:32 pm | Permalink

      So, basically, what I’m hearing is that I need to do some writing about paint drying. 🙂

      (Thanks for the compliments.)

      • Posted April 12, 2011 at 3:20 pm | Permalink

        *laughs* Yes, that’s the jist of it.
        Jessie´s most recent blog post: A Tangled KnotMy Profile

      • Wonder Woman
        Posted April 12, 2011 at 5:16 pm | Permalink

        Interesting idea. As a matter of fact, I just pulled all the paint equipment out so I could start painting Jayna’s room on Friday….perfect timing!

  3. Kelly M
    Posted April 12, 2011 at 2:43 pm | Permalink

    Thank goodness for Wonder Woman! You should keep posting whenever you have time. We enjoy reading what you have to say.

  4. Dorice
    Posted April 12, 2011 at 2:56 pm | Permalink

    While I will admit that the infrequent blogging is a bit disappointing at times, somehow it makes that rare post all the more exciting. And I also agree with Krista. It’s not what you write it’s definately how you write. Looking forward to that paint drying post. 😉

  5. Julie
    Posted April 12, 2011 at 3:10 pm | Permalink

    On your off days, I re-read Baby Alive Tink & Poops and I’m rolling on the floor again…EVERY TIME.
    We miss you but we are willing to wait. And, I’ve got paint drying at my house as we speak if you need inspiration.
    xoxo

  6. Sue V.
    Posted April 12, 2011 at 3:40 pm | Permalink

    Seriously – you shouldn’t quit – you have a way with words – real words, the every day sort of, we all have to deal with it in one way or another kind of words. Yes, as Dorice said, it is kind of disappointing when there isn’t something new – but we keep coming back to check. You’ve got a a very smart woman by your side – heed her advice.

  7. Posted April 12, 2011 at 3:46 pm | Permalink

    You can write about anything and I love reading it. Just spit something up
    Mere´s most recent blog post: Expert Witness Income – Nobodys BusinessMy Profile

  8. Posted April 12, 2011 at 5:03 pm | Permalink

    Thank goodness for Wonder Woman.
    Madiantin´s most recent blog post: For my MommaMy Profile

  9. Posted April 12, 2011 at 5:47 pm | Permalink

    Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!! I’ve only recently found you! You CANNOT quit! Thank God for Wonder Woman – she is my hero!
    Gigi´s most recent blog post: If you have about 16 hours to killMy Profile

    • Wonder Woman
      Posted April 12, 2011 at 7:39 pm | Permalink

      Yes, Thank God for Wonder Woman! Oh, I mean, thank you 🙂

  10. Posted April 12, 2011 at 8:47 pm | Permalink

    Does it help that we all are massaging your ego via comments? I hope that you take us and your lovely wife seriously and KEEP WRITING.
    Greer´s most recent blog post: practice makesMy Profile

  11. Posted April 12, 2011 at 8:55 pm | Permalink

    Maybe it’s just ebbing, not dying.
    Gen´s most recent blog post: I Did Not Get Stabbed at the Let’s Panic Book Reading!My Profile

  12. Posted April 12, 2011 at 10:04 pm | Permalink

    I feel like this sometimes. I think I just went >2 weeks without a post, and it’s partly due to my agreeing to write for another site, which means I use my weekly “blogging time” for that instead of my personal blog. However, I think it would sadden me to just quit, and I’d hate to turn into one of those people who drinks and watches TV every night, you know? So, I’ll keep saying I’m a blogger, even if most nights, I’m trying to do work that actually pays instead. At 11pm. Like it is now.

    In short, you obviously enjoying writing, so make time to do it from time to time. Maybe give yourself an hour or two on a set night each week? Whatever works, dude!
    Muskrat´s most recent blog post: 912 days without a golden shower!My Profile

  13. Posted April 12, 2011 at 10:50 pm | Permalink

    YAY Wonder Woman! No quitting allowed! I think everyone feels like that from time to time. It’ll come back to you eventually, and we will all survive off of your old posts in the meantime.
    Shell´s most recent blog post: About time for an update I supposeMy Profile

  14. Posted April 12, 2011 at 11:31 pm | Permalink

    I know how you feel. You’ve got all this other STUFF (a.k.a. “life”) going on, and always, in the back of your mind is that blog-elf tapping you on the shoulder saying, “Hey, don’t forget to come up with something very clever and important to say for your blog this week. But don’t insult anybody. And try to be humorous. Oh, and bring your camera, you’ll need a photo.”
    So you fit it in somewhere between eating and sleeping and 30 Rock, hit “publish,” and go *whew* One more down. And you think, “Is it worth it? Does anyone even read this? I mean, who CARES?”
    It is worth it.
    We read it.
    And you know who cares, because she won’t let you quit.
    Behind every good man is a Wonder Woman.
    Hang in there!

  15. Debi
    Posted April 13, 2011 at 1:47 am | Permalink

    Tell Wonder Woman thanks from me. You simply must continue to blog. I even reread the old ones until you post a new one. I love the way you can make even the most normal subject absolutely hilarious. I would miss you terribly if you decided to quit. I did discover Muskrat’s blog from yours, so you don’t want to let him, down now do you? Please keep up the good work.

  16. VaGirl2
    Posted April 13, 2011 at 7:58 am | Permalink

    I was just thinking this morning…when I look at Daddy Scratches and if you hadn’t blogged anything new, I was going to suggest for you to PLEASE blog more often…I love your posts. You write so well and are FUNNEEEEEE…and make me laugh. I even send your posts to others that need a laugh. Please don’t stop…you’ve heard that before, right?

  17. Bethie
    Posted April 13, 2011 at 8:23 am | Permalink

    I think we all understand that it’s so difficult to find time, even for things we love…..many of us are in that boat with you. So I want to tell you to do what you gotta do to take care of yourself and be happy, and if that means no more Daddy Scratches, then so be it……..but if you stopped writing, so many of us would miss your posts – quite a lot of them have me laughing out loud with tears streaming at my desk! We know you don’t have time and energy falling out of your ass, and will wait patiently for each new post. So please don’t go! *sniffle*

  18. Posted April 13, 2011 at 12:11 pm | Permalink

    Supportive spouses for the win!
    Dana´s most recent blog post: Overcome all fearsMy Profile

  19. Posted April 13, 2011 at 12:16 pm | Permalink

    Thanks, all y’all. It definitely makes a difference to know there are some peeps out there who want more. 🙂

  20. kristine N
    Posted April 14, 2011 at 7:35 am | Permalink

    You can’t stop blogging, I love reading your posts…. Makes me laugh and makes my day. Listen to WW because we as the female gender are always right….- at least 99% of the time. And as a Bostonian would miss this if you stopped …. Your sense of humor cracks me up!

  21. Posted April 14, 2011 at 10:46 am | Permalink

    You can’t walk away. In fact, we want more. You have bred greedy readers. Listen to Wonder Woman, man!
    “Susan Says…”´s most recent blog post: Snap Out of It- Catherine Zeta JonesMy Profile

  22. Posted April 14, 2011 at 11:12 am | Permalink

    Get a weekly meme going.

  23. Catherine McP
    Posted April 14, 2011 at 9:28 pm | Permalink

    I love reading whenever, whatever you got. Actually you are the only man blogger I read. I dont read a whole lotta blogs and I sure aint gonna start now, So chop chop.

  24. Val from Cape Town
    Posted April 15, 2011 at 8:49 am | Permalink

    Coming out of hiding to say keep on blogging, PLEASE!! Have been a lurker here for years and just love your posts.

  25. Posted April 15, 2011 at 2:28 pm | Permalink

    just found your blog – love it!!

  26. Posted April 15, 2011 at 9:42 pm | Permalink

    Entertain us with your toenail clippings! IDK. I’m tired. We’ve had tornadoes all day…..
    Pamela´s most recent blog post: Wild Ride on the Fun ParadeMy Profile

  27. Bonnie B.
    Posted April 15, 2011 at 11:17 pm | Permalink

    You can’t stop, dammit!!!!! I mean…….keep writing please. I LOVE your sense of humor and your writing. Please?

  28. Posted April 16, 2011 at 1:03 am | Permalink

    ok, seriously – my blog has hit a wall! I have not had time, nor the mind to write anything other then whinning. And well, that doesn’t go over very well. I have missed your humor and ancedotes that have gotten me thru many a day.

    Listen to Wonder Woman – the woman is always right!
    Cindy Lou Who´s most recent blog post: Babies- Tiaras &amp BaseballMy Profile

  29. Posted April 16, 2011 at 6:56 pm | Permalink

    You’re the only Daddy Blogger I read, and probably my second favorite blog next to Dooce (other than goofy ones like Hyperbole And A Half, sorry). I’ll understand if you end up not wanting to blog anymore or to take an extended hiatus, but I hope you don’t!

  30. LindaSalem
    Posted April 17, 2011 at 1:06 am | Permalink

    I got to your site from Pioneer Woman. How refreshing!!! Thank God for an occasional F-bomb. While I still love PW, sometimes reading the mommy blogs I feel like I’m going to have to give myself additional insulin to sop up all the sugar. You, Muskrat and Tanis are my current daily doses of reality slightly slanted. Please continue. I live to read your male vision of love for your wife and kidlets. Your irreverent humor often perks up a lousy day and I thank you for it. I’ve had a lot of back surgeries and attendant problems which often keep me up in the middle of the night and more than once I’ve had to take off for the loo because I’m can’t stop laughing and I’m afraid I’ll wake up hubby-honey. I think I’d stay away felon blogging about the drying paint shit. I don’t think is read Shakespere (I probably spelled it wrong-sigh) if he started with the Ode to Teflon but I get the point. I think you’ve probably hit a wall. Maybe get out and do something different if you can. Writers block is real so look at it from that perspective and maybe you’ll find a way to renew the juices. Also, maybe get the word out to direct more people to your blog. More comments are always cheering. I mention you a lot when I comment on other blogs. I want to encourage your other commenters to do the same. I loved the name of your blog and that intrigued me enough to give you a read. Stick around dude. As you’ve gathered, if you leave it’ll leave a hole in a lot if people’s lives. (I’m doing this from my phone and it’s easy to miss typos and disjointed statements. Forgive, please.)

  31. Jamie, Mom of 3
    Posted April 18, 2011 at 7:41 am | Permalink

    Oh! You can’t quit! I’ve had some of my best laugh out loud moments reading your blog!

  32. Sandy H
    Posted April 18, 2011 at 5:23 pm | Permalink

    ahhhh…. I’m glad you’re deciding to stick with it. It’s hard when you’re unmotivated and busy. I used to blog heavily when my first was born, as a way to fight boredom as a stay at home mom, and acquired one hell of a following! It was awesome… then I got busy, had another chud, started working, and it slowly faded away, like an obscure 80’s hair metal band. Now I’m blogless. I miss it. I wish I didn’t give it up. I miss the friends I made! agh. very frustrating. So you should keep it up. Just do it when you FEEL like it. Once a blog feels like work, es no bueno. No bueno AT ALL. (besides, you’re HILARIOUS, and as a rule of being a husband, you must ALWAYS listen to your wife. the end.)

  33. Posted April 19, 2011 at 3:11 pm | Permalink

    Wives usually know what’s best 😉
    Jenna´s most recent blog post: Spring Seed OrderMy Profile

  34. Posted April 19, 2011 at 8:08 pm | Permalink

    Keep listening to Wonder Woman! I’ve been lurking for a little while and I LOVE the way you write. Please don’t even THINK about stopping 🙂

  35. Posted April 20, 2011 at 4:36 pm | Permalink

    Maybe you just need a little break? Sometimes giving yourself a blogging-vacation rekindles the muses. But don’t stop entirely!! The masses demand entertainment. Like LindaSalem (comment #30) said above, it’s really refreshing to read a parenting blog that isn’t so saccharin. Errr…not that there’s anything wrong with saccharin. I’m constantly inspired by bloggers who take such an upbeat approach to life. But I relate better to people who say “fuck” once in a while.
    Angela@beggingtheanswer´s most recent blog post: Ive Felt The Coldness Of My Winter I Never Thought It Would Ever GoMy Profile

  36. Posted April 20, 2011 at 5:02 pm | Permalink

    Blogging is hard when you also have a busy life to attend to and/ or work in a soul crushing office 40 hours a week. My blog ebbs and flows and I’m okay with that.
    Wifeish´s most recent blog post: My BunsMy Profile

  37. Sandy
    Posted April 21, 2011 at 8:04 pm | Permalink

    Like the others, I believe that we’re looking for quality, not quantity. I check your site every week or two and am happy to see an update. I don’t read many bloggers, mostly because they’re SOOOO sappy. Hang in there — this has been a horrible year for you but things WILL get better. Listen to the wife — always good advice.

  38. Posted April 24, 2011 at 9:55 pm | Permalink

    I’d blog more often if there was a great blogging app for the iPhone… I get great ideas and start writing an entry in my head, but by the time I get home from work and have the time my inspiration is gone.

    Keep it up when you can and your audience will keep checking in…
    JBrown´s most recent blog post: Once a cheater- always a cheaterMy Profile

  39. Posted April 27, 2011 at 12:55 pm | Permalink

    First of all I am one of your lurkers. I mostly read, and not often comment because, well, I don’t know, maybe I don’t feel like I have tons to contribute, but still like to be a voyeur:) So take what you need and leave the rest —
    There’s nothing wrong with taking a self imposed vacation. We all get writers block. What I found when I was in the “hey day” of my blogging days, that I had oodles of followers, and had that edge it was fun, however, when it became a job, and it was no longer a release and clearly no fun then I had to stop. I was then writing for the benefit of other people and not to amuse myself. And now I just write for myself and truly don’t give a shit who reads me and who doesn’t. Blogging is still my way of decompressing from a full day or week but the masses don’t have me in golden handcuffs anymore.
    And when I really thought about it, and was really really honest — we’re all attention whores to some degree. We love it when people pat us on the back and validate our feelings, our writing and our talent. And for some of us we need that as it makes life that much more fulfilled.
    It’s very clear you are an amazing writer, when you just let the words flow, your edge show, and your sarcasm to peek through your words that’s when you have my attention.
    So be the master or your own domain here, take a break if you want, stop writing if you want, but you gotta do what feels good. And you know what DS? Those who really dig you, we’ll wait. Those who move on? Well they can go fuck themselves right? 🙂
    jwoap´s most recent blog post: Why Yes I Am Watching The Royal WeddingMy Profile

  40. tammy
    Posted April 29, 2011 at 10:12 am | Permalink

    Glad you are not quitting.. I love your blog…

  41. Posted May 3, 2011 at 4:51 am | Permalink

    No quitting. Not if you have a woman supporting your nervous breakdown. Keep going! We all have downs. Drugs and alcohol help. So does running, even if you hate it.

  42. Posted May 4, 2011 at 10:16 am | Permalink

    Looks like everyone wants you to continue! I get so exicted when I click over and find a new post. I totally understand the pressure to keep the blog fresh and new…mine is sitting there…waiting and waiting. While my life keeps creeping in and zapping all my time and energy. So, I totally understand your dilema. Do what is write for you and yours. (pun intended). Love your writing style!
    Sincerely,
    Pam
    aka Feast
    Pam´s most recent blog post: Pimento Cheese RecipeMy Profile

  43. Posted May 4, 2011 at 11:45 am | Permalink

    It’s Spring! I feel it too…. much more fun sitting on the deck drinking beer and watching the kids play in the yard than sitting inside on the computer. Or maybe blogger’s block… who knows…. but I agree with a previous post… we will wait for you. Always enjoy your posts.

  44. :)
    Posted May 8, 2011 at 10:09 pm | Permalink

    Keep blogging. Reading about your life is the only thing that makes my own hollow existence worth enduring.

  45. Posted May 10, 2011 at 5:11 pm | Permalink

    Okay – enough with the silence. Get another post out here right away. Can’t you hear the voice of some teacher (or parent) saying to you, “The longer you wait, the harder it’s gonna be.” Chop, chop…

  46. Katherine M
    Posted May 12, 2011 at 8:44 pm | Permalink

    waiting…..check your blog everyday….still waiting
    Your blog usually makes me smile which is a huge plus during my day.

  47. Gayle
    Posted May 16, 2011 at 3:42 pm | Permalink

    Hey, listen to MommyScratches and git busy blogging! MISS YOU. Pretty please??

  48. Posted May 18, 2011 at 11:20 am | Permalink

    I realize you have a life but you are on my blog roll and people have been complaining…..
    “Susan Says…”´s most recent blog post: A Rice Ball By Any Other Name- Part DeuxMy Profile

  49. Posted May 18, 2011 at 1:43 pm | Permalink

    Congratulations on your picture on the Pioneer Woman’s site! Awesome picture!

    And now get back to your posting please. Your fans miss you! 🙂
    Wendy´s most recent blog post: Random Cat PicturesMy Profile

  50. Sarah
    Posted May 28, 2011 at 8:30 am | Permalink

    All this showering of love from all these women just dying to hear a parenting, life, daily grind point of view in raw form from a DADDY – oh, apparently that isn’t enough for you (you probably think this comment is about you – you’re so vain). But am I the only one that has the balls (the boobs? what? weird?) to say shut the fuck up you whiner. Are you kidding me? Thanks for enlightening me to the 41 year cut-off to my dreams, to life itself. I had no idea, but now that I do, clearly I have no time to read your drivel.

    But, honestly, I get it, I do.

    And now I will go cliché on your ass – the time is NOW, and now is all we have. I agree – perhaps you are just in an ebb or have a bit of block, but I, too, come back pretty regularly despite the lack of recent posts. I even go back and re-read. But I firmly believe that you if you are *thinking about* giving up on your *dream* then you’ve already given up. Why not just accept the state that it’s in right now, dive into something else for a while, or not, but try a little acceptance and positive thinking. Clearly there is a handful of us hanging around for good reason. Even these wah-wah posts are good. They are REAL. Be real, be you, do what you will. That’s all you can do.

  51. Holly
    Posted June 5, 2011 at 3:23 am | Permalink

    Word. Don’t give up! I rarely login to my Google Reader anymore, but that’s because I’ve discovered working full time as a mom (ok, full-time stepmom to a skid with ADHD) and wife is way tougher and mroe time consuming than I thought. Still though, you bring an awesome perspective to work/kids/family with your blog. I always enjoy the stories and tidbits. I’d be sad to see it go.

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