Author Archives: Daddy Scratches

The Tenth Man

Second greatest comeback in postseason history … and you all have me to thank for it. It was the fifth inning and the Sox were getting blanked, 5-0. It was a funeral. Sox hitters looked like zombies, and Sox pitchers were helping the Rays hold an impromptu home-run derby. The TBS announcers had shovels in hand and were tossing dirt on top of the almost-closed coffin. Wonder Woman had seen enough. “I’m going to bed,” she said. “I’m sorry honey,” she added, trying to comfort me as my team rolled over and played dead. And then I had an epiphany:… [read the rest]

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Posted in Red Sox, Zan | 6 Responses

I actually quoted Dokken in my yearbook. Dokken. What a tool.

My 20-year high-school reunion is coming up next month, and I simply can’t suppress the urge to say “Whoopdeefreakindoo!” I keep waiting to feel bubbling up within me some desire to attend this event, but, so far, when I imagine waking up on the Sunday morning after it takes place, I have no premonition of regret about having skipped it. See, here’s the thing: I hated high school. When adults would say, “Enjoy it! These are the best years of your life!,” I could only assume that life was really gonna suck after graduation. (I am very happy to report… [read the rest]

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Posted in Embarrassing, Life | 12 Responses

“Teach … your children well …”

This is the mural above the food counter at a rather grubby, fairly rundown arcade/indoor amusement place to which Zan has been begging me to go with him since he learned how to speak. It rained nonstop all weekend, so we decided it was the perfect opportunity for a family adventure to the strip mall (seriously) where this mecca is located. (Wonder Women has taken the kids there a number of times, but this was my first visit—and I mention that because she deserves a great deal of credit for the things she endures.) You know that we’ve pretty much… [read the rest]

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Red Rain

We bought these back in March. Had to enter a lottery just to win an opportunity to attempt to purchase them. We figured this would be a hugely important game, and a great way to spend a Friday night in late-September—so we paid a small fortune for them. Who could have predicted that the Yankees were going to totally suck this year, and that it would be raining things much larger than cats and dogs on the night of the game? We’re praying they reschedule it … because, if they play through, we are so eating these tickets.… [read the rest]

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The Demon

Back in March of 2000, while living in the Phoenix area, I got to cover the opening night of what was supposed to be KISS’s Farewell Tour. The publicist who hooked me up with the review ticket asked if I wanted a photo pass to go with it. “Um … YA-AH!” I had never before photographed a concert, and didn’t even have a respectable camera with which to shoot one. I was told I could shoot the band during the first two songs, and that flash photography was prohibited. (I guess the band members didn’t want to get blinded and… [read the rest]

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