Category Archives: Geek

Hewlett Packard wants me to feel bad about myself

By Daddy Scratches | Published: October 2, 2009

I’ve had the color-inkjet printer shown above for just under six years, and if six human years are equal to 42 dog years, then 42 dog years are equal to 750 computer-technology years … which means, technologically speaking, my printer is … hmmm … times seven, carry the two … um … a billion years old. (I always sucked at math.) Zan recently needed to bring to school a picture of his family, so I printed one out for him. Here’s what it looked like: Turns out I had pretty much run out of ink, so I ordered some replacement… [read the rest]

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Also posted in Life | 22 Comments

One more iMac post, and then I swear, I’m done

By Daddy Scratches | Published: July 31, 2009

I couldn’t do it. I mean, look at this: I’m used to working with my HUGE iMac in the back there, not Wonder Woman’s tiny MacBook in the front there. And sitting at my desk with the one in front of the other, it was painfully obvious that the “I’ll just use the MacBook” approach wasn’t going to cut it. It also was painfully obvious that waiting for my employer to suddenly bestow upon me a new MacBook could take a loooooooong time … especially when you’re me, and you have the patience of a 5-year-old, in which case anything… [read the rest]

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Posted in Geek | 9 Comments

This is where the witty headline would go if I had enough brainpower left to come up with one.

By Daddy Scratches | Published: July 29, 2009

Man, that previous entry was funny, wasn’t? All that whoopin’ it up about my underachieving iMac? Yessiree, comical stuff. Ha ha. Ho ho. Hee hee. Well, guess what? I’M NOT LAUGHIN’! Turns out my iMac is far more fucked than I originally thought. Like, unusably fucked. We’ve been home from vacation for two days, and I have spent almost every waking moment of those two days locked in a duel to the death with the iMac … and it almost won. Pinned me to the floor, battered me about the head and shoulders, poked me in the eyes and gave… [read the rest]

Also posted in Life | 10 Comments

Pay no attention to the iMac that I just chucked out the window of a moving car on a busy superhighway during rush hour

By Daddy Scratches | Published: July 16, 2009

Hey there! Remember me? Yeah, right: Jon, a.k.a. Daddy Scratches. Man, things were really going well around here; traffic to the website was going up, up, UP, the audience was growing, and I was basking in the glow of your patronage and praise. Great for my self-esteem and sense of purpose. So, of course, that had to be stopped. And thank GAWD The Universe finally stepped in and bitch-slapped me down a few notches, because I was beginning to fear I might be on to something BIG here, and what would I do with that kind of success? Pffft. My… [read the rest]

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Also posted in Life | 22 Comments

TiVo’s ‘Video On Demand’ feature is AWESOME … and by ‘AWESOME,’ I mean it blows

By Daddy Scratches | Published: March 31, 2009

One of the nice things about having two children who no longer are babies is that you can actually do things with them. Yes, I know, there are those—Wonder Woman herself, even—who get all misty when they think about the baby years, and feel a twinge inside whenever they see someone with a newborn … a twinge that says, “Baby! Baby cute! Baby cuddly! Baby so sweet! Must have another!” I feel a different twinge … a twinge that says, “Oh, you don’t even know what a great time you’re going to have during the looooooong, sleep-deprived, sanity-testing months to… [read the rest]

Also posted in Family, Parenthood, TV | 20 Comments

Reasons I Love Her, No. 337

By Daddy Scratches | Published: December 8, 2008

Scene: Me, in my office, spending my umpteenth hour of the past week working on a freelance web-programming project, payment for which will make it possible for Santa to leave another mind-numbingly huge batch of presents this year for Zan and Jayna, ensure that our heat continues to function for a short while longer, and keep us slightly beyond the reach of the snapping jaws of home foreclosure. I have just built into the client’s website an insanely cool javascript-pop-up-window thing that I accomplished by geek geek geek blah blah blah, and, I assure you, it’s amazing. Sadly, no one… [read the rest]

Also posted in Marriage | 4 Comments

I like this Army better

By Daddy Scratches | Published: November 16, 2006

A few weeks back, my workweek began with an assignment that kicked much ass. I was invited to attend an exclusive, in-studio performance by Army of Anyone, a new rock group that features former Filter frontman Richard Patrick, former Stone Temple Pilots members/brothers Robert DeLeo (bass) and Dean DeLeo (guitar), and former David Lee Roth Band drummer Ray Luzier. The show took place at Boston radio station WBCN. Following the performance, I got to sit down with Richard and Robert, who I interviewed for about 40 minutes. Though I’ve done a number of interviews in the past, this was my… [read the rest]

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Also posted in Music, Writing | 2 Comments

Happy New Year

By Daddy Scratches | Published: January 1, 2006

Eleven months ago, I installed WordPress on my server. I posted a dozen or so entries using the default Kubrick theme (some of which I’ll probably migrate over to this new set-up). Then I decided to create my own theme. It only took me the better part of a full year to finally get it online. I was determined to get the site up and running before the end of today. I made it—with about an hour to spare, even. Figured I’d start 2006 on the right foot. This place is currently held together with spit, chewing gum and some… [read the rest]

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