Category Archives: Life

Exciting news: I am now the millionaire owner of a Major League Baseball school whose employee roster includes Michael Cudlitz, star of the TNT cop-drama “SouthLAnd.”

I saw a tweet the other day from Michael Cudlitz in which he reminded his followers that the season premiere of “SouthLAnd” airs tonight. And as I read that tweet, it occurred to me that I once participated in a promotional push for the show by posting a blog entry that coincided with the show’s spring-2010 season premiere. And for some reason, I decided to look for that post on Google … which is how I stumbled upon this: Whaaaa…? Well, we’re going to have to click on that, now, aren’t we? Let’s see where it goes. Turns out that,… [read the rest]

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Also posted in TV | 6 Responses

If you like this, you should probably put a ring on it … and then you should get your head checked by a mental-health professional.

Super Bowl Fun Fact: That outfit Beyoncé had on? I’m wearing the same thing. Tough to walk in these shoes, but my ass looks spectacular. — Daddy Scratches (@DaddyScratches) February 4, 2013 What, you thought I was kidding? Awesome — and real — Beyonce images HERE.… [read the rest]

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Also posted in PhotoChops | 7 Responses

Burger King spiked my co-worker’s fries with a mind-altering substance

It all started with a peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich. We ran out of sliced turkey … and being the financially sensible (read: broke) person that I am, I decided that, rather than eat out, I would bring to work a peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich. Lunchtime arrived. I was weak. Faint. Famished. I ate the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich. It was, shall we say, less than satisfying. I was fucking starving. To death, even. Death was imminent. My co-worker, meanwhile, opted for Burger King … a place from which I had not eaten a single morsel in more than 10 years. It was 2002 when last I… [read the rest]

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Also posted in Cubicle | 11 Responses

This entire thing is in my stomach right now

File under “Irony” … Right after lunch, I got this email from my doc: Your labs from yesterday are excellent. As expected, your HDL (good) cholesterol is even higher [than last year], and the remainder of your numbers are healthy. Please have someone carve that on my tombstone this weekend. Thanks. I’m gonna miss you guys.… [read the rest]

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Posted in Life | 5 Responses

I appreciate this company-sanctioned act of rebellion

I feel young. Wild. Free. Look at me, bitches! I’m flipping off the establishment! Screw you, responsibility and adulthood! I’m a modern day Peter Pan! (If Peter Pan spent 40 hours per week in a cubicle farm, that is.) Khakis and dress shoes be damned. Today, I’m dressing down. Today, it’s jeans and sneakers. Because today? Today, my friends … is Casual Friday! Yeah, baby! Today, I’m sticking it to The Man! (With his permission, of course.) (Thank you, sir. May I have another?)… [read the rest]

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Also posted in Cubicle | 12 Responses