“Hello? … Yeah, this is him. … I have a what? … A blog? Oh, shit, that’s right.” Ahem. Hey, you guys! How’s it going? Me? No, I didn’t die; I’ve just been trying desperately to make the minimum monthly payments on my Mt. Everest-sized pile of debt … and since my mad website-building skillz currently pay more than my mad blogging skillz, I’ve been focusing as of late on the former endeavor … which explains why I currently am in Boston attending An Event Apart, a conference for people who build websites. The best part about attending the conference?… [read the rest]
Daddy's Briefs
- Did u know Flickr videos don't render in iOS? I didn't...so here's my home-run story again, with iOS-friendly video: http://t.co/FwasqURyp0 about 1 day ago
- In the fairy-tale version of this story, I would have hit an epic home run: http://t.co/FwasqURyp0 about 2 days ago
- If my time in the batting cage tonight is any indication, the followup to my latest post will be hysterical ... to everyone but me, that is. about 1 week ago
- Don't know how I missed this tweet from @trent_reznor weeks ago ... but this + the new NIN song = Christmas in June. https://t.co/4p2zffWFK8 about 1 week ago
- Went to bed in my @nineinchnails T-shirt and woke up to a new NIN song. It's like the Tooth Fairy x 1,000. http://t.co/djy0NeKhfW about 1 week ago
- I wrote something. Try not to faint. New post: Take Me Out to the Therapist... Take Me Out to the Shrink... http://t.co/lTYSn8CjXj about 2 weeks ago
- The boy & I are deep in enemy territory tonight. @RedSox vs @Phillies http://t.co/wBHIRjbrcJ about 2 weeks ago
- Dear Bud Light Lime-a-rita: If the objective of your inaugural commercial was to make me throw up in my mouth ... job well done! about 3 weeks ago
More ways to love me
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Recent Posts
- In the fairy-tale version of this story, I would have hit an epic home run
- Take Me Out to the Therapist… Take Me Out to the Shrink…
- No, I don’t miss this view at all. Why do you ask? *weep*
- Believe it or not, Hallmark passed on this one
- Exciting news: I am now the millionaire owner of a Major League Baseball school whose employee roster includes Michael Cudlitz, star of the TNT cop-drama “SouthLAnd.”
- And then I got into a political argument with Boston Red Sox pitching legend Curt Schilling
- If you like this, you should probably put a ring on it … and then you should get your head checked by a mental-health professional.
- Burger King spiked my co-worker’s fries with a mind-altering substance
- The Scratches Take Manhattan, Part 3
Recent Comments
- Safety 1st my ass (15)
- mommyteya: I – a meer woman – have never had such a hard time getting my child out of the seat. I think...
- Quest for Fun (20)
- Issac: Nice post and All your kids will remember is the fun they had and how awesome their parents are. Great choice!
- Believe it or not, Hallmark passed on this one (5)
- Jim Liston: Hallmark doesn’t have a sense of humor. I’ve been looking for a great card about the first...
- Jayna: 7 years (6)
- Ted Evans: Your daughter and my daughter is about the same age and I find it funny that we have the same issues (The...
- It will be best for my daughter’s future boyfriend if someone hides this picture from me, because if I should happen to see it on the night that he comes to fetch her for their first date, I will pummel his teenage ass to smithereens (39)
- Moiz Khan: Awwww….this is such a beautiful article. Im only 22 but I would just love to have a daughter. They...
- Safety 1st my ass (15)
Greatest Hits
- A note to my children from The Elf on the Shelf
- Just take the fucking medicine! A nursery Rhyme
- Mother Nature is a heartless wench who will turn your own children against you
- The time I almost became a highly paid insurance mascot.
- The time I built a car … I mean, a high-tech doorstop.
- The time I committed the most embarrassing social gaffe in the history of embarrassing social gaffes.
- The time I couldn't free my daughter from a bath seat in which she had become trapped.
- The time I did my best to completely sabotage a dream vacation.
- The time I finally used my passport.
- The time I got a vasectomy.
- The time I hung out with Van Halen.
- The time I nearly burned down my house.
- The time I partied with all the cool mommybloggers and saved The Bloggess's life … sort of.
- The time I thought my son was going to get his ass kicked by a girl.
- The time I was forced to deal with an incontinent doll.
- Why, yes, children, of course we can get a dog … and by “yes” I mean “fuck no.”
- Zombie Dinner Party … with your chef, Dr. Hannibal Lector





















And then I got into a political argument with Boston Red Sox pitching legend Curt Schilling
Curt Schilling is a baseball god to me. What he did with my beloved Red Sox in 2004 — the bloody sock, Game 6 of the ALCS, the team’s first World Series victory in 86 years (a victory for which Curt was largely responsible) — earned a revered and hallowed place in my heart for Curt Schilling The Pitcher. Curt Schilling The Political Commentator? Not so much. Which brings us to the following tête-à-tête (tweet-a-tweet?). nytimes.com/2013/02/05/us/… Men & women fought and died for this right, gave their lives for this right, and we’re going to complain about a wait? —… [read the rest]